30 Av 5777 / Tuesday, August 22, 2017 | Torah Reading: Shoftim
 
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Prayer and Dry Beds     Prayer and Dry Beds

Eleven year old Benji had wet his bed for most of his life. With less than a week left before he was leaving for two months of sleepaway camp, you can imagine how nervous he was...

 



The more I learn about emuna from Rebbe Nachman, Rabbi Shalom Arush and Rabbi Lazer Brody, the more I’m seeing how simple emuna is all that people need to heal and grow though all kinds of difficulties.

  

When I meet a person who has a “problem” and really wants to solve the problem with emuna, I know that person will surely succeed. This type of person, who is looking for emuna coaching, is usually already reading Rabbi Arush, the Breslev website and LazerBeams so they are primed for a method of healing that is based on faith, prayer and Torah-based advice. This type of person may be quite intelligent but they are emotionally depleted from relying on their own intellectual analysis of what their problems mean and where they come from and what they should logically do about them.  

 

Children are also great candidates for emuna-therapy because their minds have not yet been cluttered up with the limiting belief that relief from suffering can only come from a doctor and not through a spiritual healer.  Kids don’t think of me as a doctor who is going to do doctor stuff to them. They think of me as someone who will teach them how to get closer to Hashem so that Hashem will relieve them of the pain of a certain ailment or situation that they are suffering from.

 

Benji is a Jewish kid who had no preconceptions about what “therapy” must be. He also had no doubts that Hashem had the power to help him if he only knew how to get the help he needed from Hashem.  So Benji’s “treatment” was nothing more than teaching him about Hashem and how Hashem has helped lots of other kids like him.

 

Benji, who is 11 years old, had wet his bed for most of his life. With less than a week left before he was leaving for two months of sleepaway camp, you can imagine how nervous Benj was. None of the many conventional treatments for enuresis (bedwetting) - including medication – had worked for him.

 

My entire discussion with Benji was over the telephone speaking to him in my very-broken Yiddish (his native tongue). I began as usual by speaking about the greatness of Hashem, his never-ending love for us and His unlimited power to heal us and relieve us from our troubles.  I explained that the key to getting Hashem to help him have dry beds was by speaking to Hashem every night for 5 minutes before he goes to sleep and to just thank Hashem for all the years of wet beds that he had because this was just Hashem’s way of getting to hear his sweet voice every night before sleep. I promised Benji that if he followed my advice, that he would not only have dry beds for the rest of his life but that there was much more that Hashem gives to people who speak to Him.

 

There were only a few more things that Benji needed to know before his first personal prayer session that night. He needed to know that I was merely coaching him about how to get what he needs from Hashem, but that only Hashem could actually give him dry beds, not me. He also needed to know that there was no guarantee that Hashem would give him dry beds right away or even at all. Of course we both hoped that Hashem would alleviate the problem before he left for sleepaway camp but he needed to be prepared to accept that it might take longer. I told him that even if Hashem decided to make him wait longer, it was only because He loved hearing from him every night. I told him that if he didn’t see results that he should just keep asking Hashem for emuna.  I told Benji, that if he was patient and kept praying like this every night, that sooner or later Hashem would certainly answer him.

 

Benji started thanking Hashem every night before he went to sleep without anyone reminding him to do so. He thanked Hashem in advance saying: “I’m thanking you now Hashem for helping me to have dry beds even though I don’t know exactly when the dry beds will start coming. Please stay close to me, Hashem, while I’m sleeping, and if my bladder is full, wake me up in time to go the bathroom so I can come back to the nice dry sheets and blankets that you have given me. Hashem, have mercy on me and help me to believe that You and only You can cure me. Please Hashem, help me to believe that You and only You can help me “hold the pishy” all night long and only You can wake me up in time to go to the bathroom if my bladder is full.  I know this is all true, Hashem, because now I know that just like You’re the boss of the whole world, You’re the boss of my body and my bladder too.”

 

After giving Benji these ideas and a few other ideas about how to speak to Hashem at night before going to sleep, I had him practice telling me, in his own words, over the phone what he was going to say to Hashem. When he did, I was glad to hear that in some ways Benji changed what I had told him so as to speak to Hashem in his own unique way.

 

I had one 50 minute session and two 20 minute follow up sessions with Benji before he happily left for camp empowered not only with pride in himself and his comfortable dry beds, but with a beautiful new relationship – with his Father-in Heaven. May his prayers give pleasure to the Creator for many years to come.

 

 

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We invite you to visit Dr. Zev Ballen's popular daily web journal Spiritual Coaching.





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