Evening the Score

Translated by Rabbi Lazer Brody

 
One of the strangest dilemmas in the annals of our people is the golden calf. How in the world could the Children of Israel fall for something so inane as worshiping an idol? They certainly weren’t stupid! They saw phenomenal miracles on their way out of bondage in Egypt. What happened?
 
Our sages teach us (Yalkut Shimoni, Jeremiah, 236) that the Children of Israel knew that idolatry was nonsense; but they engaged in idolatry to permit themselves to engage in arayot, forbidden sexual activities.
 
Rebbe Nachman of Breslev (Likutei Moharan I:19) calls the lust for forbidden sexual activities, “the general evil.” He likens this lust to an uncontrollable fire. This fire so totally consumes a person’s logic and common sense to the extent that the person will do things like a mad man in utter disregard for anything or anyone until his lust is satiated (which it never is). It’s consequently understandable how people that suffer from such lust lose their homes, their jobs, and their families. By allowing this lust to blind and them, they virtually lose their minds, too.

Rebbe Nachman differentiates between all the transgressions of Torah and between the transgression of pgam habrit, the breach of personal holiness that includes all the sins of forbidden sexual relations and related misdeeds such as looking at other woman, reading lewd books and using unwholesome language. We have 613 mitzvot, each corresponding to one of the 613 spiritual parts of the soul. Any given transgression blemishes the soul. But, a man’s lust for women extinguishes the flame of his soul altogether. Nothing could be worse.
 
During these weeks of Shovevim – the six week period between the Torah portions of Shmot to Mishpatim, is known as a special time for enhancing our personal holiness. Hashem gives extraordinary assistance to anyone who seeks personal improvement. The area of personal holiness is so important that Rebbe Nachman said, “Here, first of all, one should strive to be perfect; then, it won’t matter if one is less than perfect in other areas.” A person is obliged to go in the path of his rabbi and spiritual guide; since excellence in personal holiness was Rebbe Nachman’s forte, then we too must seek the path of personal holiness.
 
Personal holiness is the source of all blessings. Who doesn’t need a blessing? This person needs better health, another person needs more income, a yet someone else has marital problems or a problem with a child. Rebbe Nachman teaches us that personal holiness is the source of all blessings. The implications are eye-opening: anyone who earnestly strives to strengthen personal holiness – whether it be a man’s stronger attempts in guarding his eyes or a woman’s greater desire to dress and act more modestly – is able to invoke upon himself or herself all the very best of blessings!
 
Probably the two most pressing problems of this generation are first, the children who fall under all types of impure influences and end up leaving the fold of observant Judaism; and second, financial difficulties. With this in mind, look at the blank check that Rebbe Nachman writes for every one of us: “He who controls his evil inclinations, his children will not succumb to evil ways; not only that, but his assets shall be blessed” (Sefer HaMiddot, Banim, 16). Where can you get a better blessing nowadays? Who can give you a better insurance policy for raising upright children?
 
Let’s go a step further: many new (and veteran) BTs (baalei teshuva, newly observant Jews), come to me with complaints how their life is so difficult, and how they feel disadvantaged compared to the FFB (frum from birth) sons and daughters of Torah scholars and rabbis who seem to have a much easier and less-spiritually challenging life. One young man asked me, “Rabbi, my father was a convicted criminal who did plenty of time behind bars; I don’t have the benefit of zchut avot, parental merit. Torah and mitzvoth are so hard for me; what can I do?”
 
Here again, I took out my Rebbe Nachman book of blank signed checks and said to the young man, “Look here at Sefer Middot (Ne’uf, 42): ‘Anyone that guards his personal holiness – even if he lacks parental merit – Hashem creates for him merit!” By personal holiness, you don’t have to worry if your father wasn’t the head of a Yeshiva; Hashem is your Father – you carry His merit!” Excellence in personal holiness propels anyone up the spiritual ladder. By virtue of personal holiness, a convict’s son can not only even the score, but spiritually surpass the Rosh Yeshiva’s son.
 
The entire purpose of our Torah learning is to uplift ourselves from the muck and mire of sexual lust. As long as a person harbors this lust, it’s a sign that he hasn’t internalized his Torah learning.
 
The whole purpose of our exile in Egypt was to withstand the test of Egyptian debauchery and immorality.
 
Lust is dangerous – it causes amnesia. That’s why we can never rest – we have to beg Hashem every day in our personal prayers to help us maintain our personal holiness.
 
You don’t have to be an expert in child education to raise good children. The more a home is free of unwholesomeness, the more a man guards his eyes and a woman dresses modestly, the better the children. May we succeed together in building a holy nation, amen.