All My Helpers

I decided that I would devote an article to thank all those who make the running of my home possible. Without them, I don’t know how I would manage! Now please—no jealous hankerings out there—some people just need a little more help than others, and there is nothing wrong with using a public forum in order to give credit where credit is due.

First and foremost, because in our house, it is quite an important task—our laundry lady. She is a master at stain removal, mold prevention, and she knows how to separate her darks from whites. Sometimes you can find her doing laundry from early morn ’till early morn—yes, we love her so much, that she is a permanent fixture in our house (yawn—excuse me!) all through the day and sometimes even half the night! Though—come to think of it, my favorite top is not in my drawer….gotta talk to her about increasing efficiency. Anyway, it’s so hard to get good help these days…

Next round of accolades go to our cook. Cook—what would we do without you? Who else would be so brave to take upon themselves a job with nary a thanks, and lots of disgruntled customers? If you please one, there are at least two turning up their noses, one covering your perfectly spiced dish with half a bottle of ketchup, and there is always—always–that one abstention! What bravado, to keep plodding at the stove, day after day, with the knowledge that very few dishes can please all palettes. Despite this difficult task, you persevere—and for that, we are grateful, though next time—please hold the salt on the Zucchini soup—thanks.

Of course, after cook comes our resident baker, who happens to work very erratic hours. But we really like her, so we don’t mind that the mixer usually comes out past midnight in our house (yawn—there it goes again!) The kids have to have their fill of muffins and home baked cookies—for what would childhood be without the fragrant smell of chocolate chip Mandelbrot and homemade challah embedded in their olfactory memories? No—we can’t let go of our baker! I must tell her to make a couple of batches of those new oatmeal cookies…..

A home is not a home, without a ready warm embrace, and someone to share a good laugh with. For that, we thank our pseudo nanny who gets on the floor to read board books, help find lost Play Mobil, and to be the one to reunite the Lego man with his missing head. She plays card games, or she might be found reading a good book to the kids, complete with a full repertoire of animal noises. She sings a mean Old McCohen had a farm, and can do a great rendition of The Wheels on the Bus. Sometimes, she might venture out with the kiddies for some fresh air, or just listen. The kids love her. What can I say? She even changes diapers! Now tell me—is this not, like, something to be grateful for?

Of course it’s nice to have someone watch the kids, but what is really great is the nighttime nurse—it doesn’t matter if the baby is up once, twice, or even three or four times! She is (yawn—excuse me!) right there in the thick of things! And let me tell you—there have been times—oh, have there been times—when one is crying from strep, and the other one over there is screaming from an ear infection, and she just keeps patting them both on the back, singing those Old McCohen’s and Wheels on the Bus—which she picked up from nanny, of course—even at three in the morning!

At this point I would like to applaud our good ol’ secretary—who sets up, cancels, and then reschedules all of our appointments—day after day. These are just a sampling of  the numerous arrangements that must be made on a regular basis: doctors, dentist, school meetings, bake sales, PTA events, parent teacher conferences, checkups, —not to mention the thousand and one other things, like setting up—and keeping track of—after school activities, play dates, Yeshiva entrance exams, army appointments, important high school tests that need praying for, special conference calls, birthday reminders, Grandma and Grandpa’s anniversary (can’t forget that one!) dermatologist appointments scheduled three months back—whew!–the list is endless! I think this lady needs a raise…

Then of course, I have my own personal shopper. Now calm down out there—for some of us, it’s not a luxury, but a necessity! I really need to thank this special woman, who does my shopping for me. She goes into at least four supermarkets at least four times a week—and sometimes even on the same day! She grabs hold of all of our school supply lists, health food store lists, fish store lists, shoe store lists, kosher butcher lists—I know I have left out about ten other places—but never you mind. She’s got a good pair of shoes, and whether it be rain and sleet or blazing heat—she is out there, hitting the pavement, making sure that everyone has their dry cleaning/new binder/special Mishnah/snacks for field trip/new glasses/and the much needed white shirt for Shabbat. As they say in Israel—kol ha kavod (great going)!

Then, of course, there are all the other things that one needs a good cadre of volunteers, just to keep up! There are those events one needs to attend such as school/camp performances and the occasional karate tournament; all those aforementioned PTA meetings, which for some reason, never end before eleven at night; the ballet performances, and the end of the year four hour marathon performances; the gan (kindergarten) project nights, with some complicated project that all the Israeli mothers seem to master effortlessly. Then of course, there’s the races to the bus in the morning, school drop offs and pick-ups, and the pick-ups in between (ma, I just don’t feel good!) kind. There’s the emergency plumbing scenarios, and the ‘I don’t know what they were thinking when they climbed up there’ situations, which require those emergency stitches. Now really—do you expect me to do all this by myself?

Well, the obvious answer is, no.

And that is where Hashem comes in.

So what about all of my ‘little helpers’? Well, by now it has been perfectly clear that all of my helpers live only as a figment of my imagination (along with a bit of whimsical wishful thinking…). And in actuality they all live inside little ol’ me! If the list of tasks seemed long—well it is! And only because Hashem provides the energy, the health and the ability to execute each one of these tasks does it all happen—day after day after day….

So all you mothers out there—give Hashem—and yourselves—a big round of applause! Look at all that you accomplish in a week, a day, an hour! Look back at the day which you just wrote off as having accomplished nothing—and look how much you actually do! As someone recently said (sorry—I just can’t remember who) that even when a pregnant woman does ‘nothing’ she is in a constant state of creating, nurturing, and sustaining a life! So mothers—even when it seems we are doing ‘nothing’ at times—we are always doing something!

So the next time you find yourself quizzing your child on their multiplication tables while making dinner while simultaneously rocking the baby’s car seat with your foot, while giving the silent warning glare to the child across the room (who is about to give a haircut to an unsuspecting sibling) while trying to remember the number for the Orthodontist to make that appointment before they close and oh I know the perfect ending for that article and—yikes! I think the cookies are done……

“MA? Do I have a clean pair of pants for tomorrow?”

“Whad’ja say honey? Oh—go ask the laundry lady—and don’t forget to thank her!”

 Isn’t she the greatest? (Thanks Hashem!)