Soul Food on a Spiritual Diet

I spent the better half of my childhood feeling itchy. Yes, itchy. Red, patchy, inflamed, uncomfortable, irritated –ITCHY.

My itchy condition was otherwise known as eczema.  With nothing but topical ointments to ease the itch, I was forever running to my dad, the keeper of the magical meds, for another dose of hydrocortisone cream. At first the eczema was mainly on my inner elbows and behind my knees but as I got older it spread to my earlobes, stomach, scalp, and occasionally eyelids.

As a child I remember asking my doctor why I had eczema, what made it worse and if it would ever go away. I asked if maybe it was caused by certain foods, but the doctor answered with a definitive NO. “It’s definitely not food related,” he said, “it’s genetic.” This is just how I am, he spouted, and this is probably how I’ll always be.  Steroid creams, and oatmeal baths would be my only salvation.

And so it was throughout my teenage years…I trudged on in a cycle of itchy skin and temporary relief. Then in my 20’s, I decided I had to try something new and alternative. Something totally different.  So I met with a holistic doctor who took one hard look at my tongue and said, “You’re allergic to wheat.”

Allergic to wheat? Me? How could that be? The idea was preposterous to me. What did wheat have to do with eczema? Besides, nobody in my family was allergic to wheat. We didn’t have allergies….well, I was lactose intolerant, allergic to salmon, and petting certain dogs caused me to break out in hives, but I didn’t consider myself an allergic type of person! Not sure if I should believe him, but willing to try anything at that point, I decided to cut out all wheat products for a month to see what would happen. Growing up on the SAD (Standard American Diet), rich in processed foods and loaded with white flour, giving up wheat was not an easy thing to do. But thank G-d I did, because before the month was up my skin was COMPLETELY clear. And I have remained eczema-free ever since. In fact, the only times I’ve had a flare up over the past 13 years have been the few times I tested the limits and ate wheat.

Now, I know my story isn’t really that unique. If I would have written this 30 years ago, before most people made the food–skin connection, it might have been interesting. But now, food allergies are so common, just about everybody knows somebody with a severe gluten intolerance or airborne peanut allergy. And it’s certainly common knowledge that food can trigger eczema, as well as many other unpleasant reactions in the body. So why am I sharing this bit of history about myself?

Well, around the same time that I met with the holistic tongue-reading doctor, I was also at a spiritual turning point in my life. I was newly married, newly pregnant, and discovering G-d in a whole new way. I had new teachers and role models who were emphasizing new points about Torah, and Judaism began to feel like a new religion to me. The Torah was suddenly so much more interesting, practical and uplifting than it used to be. With these new teachings, being Jewish was happy. G-d was good. And Jewish law became beautiful. No more oppressive rules, harsh philosophies, depressing holidays, or boring texts. No, I did not invent my own self-serving religion or start taking happy pills.  To put it simply, I removed myself from the old, cold Judaism which I had come to know from my schooling, and I started connecting to Torah in a way that was healthy and nourishing to me. In other words, I changed my spiritual diet.

The G-d that I knew before this turning point had a sadistic side. He wasn’t the all-loving, fair, and trustworthy G-d that I have subsequently come to know. The philosophies I learned about had traces of cruelty, hypocrisy, and male chauvinism. I don’t blame anyone for my mis-education, in fact, in retrospect I’m grateful for it because it helped me come closer to G-d and appreciate my Jewish-ness.  But the Torah education that I was being fed as a child was not healthy for me. It was strict and severe. It may have been healthy for those around me, but for my particular spiritual digestive system, it was harmful. I did not have the proper enzymes to break it down and filter out the husk.  And since the physical world mirrors the spiritual world via messages and metaphors, it makes sense that if the food I was taking in was irritating my body, then the soul food that I was taking in was irritating my spirit.

Today, more than ever, it seems that so many people have food allergies and intolerances. It also seems that so many people are off the Jewish path, disconnected from G-d, rebelling against the Torah, or robotically going through the motions like a disengaged zombie.  Perhaps this is because so many people haven’t realized what ingredients they are allergic to in their spiritual diet or what nutrients they are missing.  We can’t all be expected to eat and flourish from the exact same diet if we are all unique beings. G-d has built, designed and copyrighted each one of us with a unique physical, emotional and spiritual make up. While one person thrives on a vegan diet, another person can hardly function without meat. For some, oranges are a delicious and healthy source vitamin C, while for others, just being around them will make their throats swell in anaphylactic shock and close up. Likewise, learning about G-d from the approach of discipline and reward and punishment might be inspirational for some, but sickening and terrifying for others. What is spiritually nourishing for one may cause an allergic reaction in another.

But just as there is an abundance of gluten free, dairy free and soy free foods today, there is also an abundance of amazing Torah teachers whose teachings are free of whatever allergens ail us as well! These teachers are accessible and available to us all. We just need to search them out and pray that G-d helps us find them.

And thank G-d, after many years of searching, G-d has lead me to the right spiritual leaders, who through their personal examples and inspirational teachings, nourish my soul and strengthen my mind.  My teachers are Rabbi Lazer Brody and Rabbi Shalom Arush. For me, the Torah they teach is the wheat-free, dairy-free, fish-free, non-processed, non-GMO, organic, delicious soul food that I have been hungry for all my life. It’s rich in nutrients, tastes great, and has no negative side effects.

And most importantly, it’s completely digestible.

So now, instead of running to my dad for medicinal relief for itchy skin, I run to my spiritual father, Rabbi Lazer Brody, for a dose of vitamin E(munah). This gives me the spiritual strength I need and the inspiration to turn to my Father in heaven who then gives me the ultimate soul comfort.

Having learned through trial and error which foods feel great in my body and which ones make me feel weak and uncomfortable has been a journey paralleling my spiritual search. I am grateful that Hashem has uncovered this and led me to do what feels right for my body, mind, and soul, but I know that my way isn’t what’s best for everyone else. Everyone has his or her own optimal diet.  Therefore, I want to bless all of us that we find our unique path to what’s healthy and nourishing and continue to draw closer to Hashem with joy and gratitude. Bon Appetite! B’te’avon!