Angels in Disguise
As we approach Rosh Hashanah, read this amazing, true story of helping those who least deserve it.
Unfortunately in our position as a Rov and a Rebbetzin we sometimes come across extreme cases of misfortune within the community, things that destroy one’s peace of mind and cause much heartache. In one case, an unfortunate young man and his wife who do not understand the meaning of responsibility (to put it nicely).
This young man has always been known as ”a person without mazal” – misfortune always pursued him and caught up with him too. Whatever he turned his hand to was always unsuccessful; he was always on the verge of ”striking it rich” but unfortunately always ”struck it poor”. According to the young man, he of course was never to blame; it was always someone who had let him down, or something unfortunate that had happened at the wrong time, and by now he simply has a massive chip on his shoulder and little emuna. His wife is not as bitter as he is, but her feeling is that as her husband ”has no mazal” the world (meaning the kehillah) owes her a living, and (by now) her three small children.
The community has throughout the years tried to help the family; vast amounts of money have been poured into this household in an attempt to put them on their feet.
But we’ve finally come to an impasse. Both the husband and wife promise faithfully to abide by whatever agreement is worked out, and then just as faithfully break it and misuse the funds they are given. Instead of buying food for the family or paying (very-overdue) utility bills, they splurge the money on outrageous luxuries and live the rich life, as if there is no tomorrow (which for them is true because when this money is used-up someone will surely bail them out again, as has always been the case).
Within a week or two the mother is back to phoning people again begging for help, that the baby has been crying with hunger because it hasn’t eaten all day because there’s no baby food in the house, and that she hasn’t been able to change the baby all day either because she has no money to buy Pampers with.
The utilities are cut off on a regular basis and the reason why the family has managed till now is because there has always been ”someone” (or many ”someones”) to pay a utility bill or clear a massive debt at the grocery.
It’s terrible to see how the children go around with dirty clothing and look unkempt and undernourished. In short the parents are feckless, irresponsible people who do not even begin to understand how to care for their children.
Finally, after about eight years, where the situation has not changed at all, and where the husband and wife have become downright abusive to anyone who tries to ”interfere” and tell them how to manage their finances (as opposed to just giving them money and letting them do what they want with it) the kehillah has come to the conclusion that it’s simply money being ”poured down the drain”, and that it’s useless to carry on in this way. The best community activists refuse to be involved in the case anymore as they are just showered with abuse (both verbal and physical) and can make no headway with the family at all. Worse than anything for us is the realization that the children are being neglected.
The matter came to a climax this week when the wife phoned me up and asked me to talk to the Rov; could he please help them as there was an unpaid electricity bill. The electricity company had cut off the electricity and in the heat of the summer it was unbearable. I replied that I would talk to the Rov when he came home for lunch and that she should phone me in the evening for a reply; with that the conversation ended.
The Rov’s reply was that he himself has helped them countless times and he is simply unable to do so at present as there are many other needy cases. He told me that when the wife phoned back I should explain this to her as gently as possible; although I waited all evening she did not phone me back.
Early the next morning the phone calls began. Quite simply, the wife had phoned anyone they owed money to and told them that the Rov had taken over the family’s case and would be dealing with it, including paying all their debts; in order to simplify matters for the callers she had even given them our number.
Since everyone knows this family, it wasn’t too difficult to explain that this was not the case at all and that we had most certainly not assumed responsibility for the family.
But I was caught by surprise when the electricity company phoned me. When I explained (once again) to the gentleman on the phone that we were not responsible for the family, he was quite taken aback and put me through to his division manager. Fair enough, I thought to myself as I waited for her to come on the line, the electricity company is not a charity organization and they want their bill paid (an accumulation of more than a year’s worth of electricity).
When the division manager came on the line and heard what I had to say she began to tell me her side of the story.
The electricity company has had a lot of trouble with this family and the electricity has been cut off and restored a few times throughout the years. In an effort to negotiate an agreement to pay the overdue amount in small installments, she herself had gone to their home a few times, and what she had seen there had upset her so much that she had had a few sleepless nights over it.
SHE begged ME to please do something to at least help the children. She accepted that with people like these there was a limit to what we could do and they would have to suffer the consequences of their actions, but she said the children were innocent and blameless and should not have to suffer. Here she was, a senior executive of the electric company, pleading with me to help the children as if she had nothing else to worry about. She didn’t say another word about the money they owed: “Please, please, help those children!”
I was so astounded that I was dumbstruck for a minute. In the end I told her that I would do my utmost to help them, for which SHE thanked me profusely!
Have you ever heard of the electricity company behaving that way to a long-term troublesome debtor? Such is life in the Land of Israel.
Such are our people, a bunch of angels in disguise. Before Rosh Hashanah, let’s cry out to Hashem, “Hashem! See what a wonderful nation you have – there is none other like them! Please inscribe them in The Book of Life for a wonderful New Year, amen!”
What’s that up in the sky? A wireman from the power company? In Israel, it’s probably an angel in disguise!
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