One Infamous Night
Why not just punish the generation that cried and complained about Hashem? Why the destruction of the Temple, the Spanish Inquisition, exile, and even the Holocaust?
Translated by Rabbi Lazer Brody
Stop Crying, Part 3
Let’s review what we’ve learned until now:
Point #1: If a person doesn’t work seriously on character improvement, he’ll never change.
Point #2: The root of all our problems since the beginning of time is ingratitude.
For the sake of our learning together, let’s ask Hashem a question. First, Hashem – we all believe in You. We know that you do everything for the best. But we don’t always understand you. The Torah in Parshat Shlach Lecho tells about the sin of the Meraglim, when ten out of twelve of Israel’s leaders that were chosen to spy the Promised Land returned and said terrible things about the Land of Israel. As a result, the People of Israel cried and complained a whole night for no reason. There blasphemy against Hashem was terrible, for they said (see Deuteronomy 1:27) that Hashem took them out of Egypt because He hates them, G-d forbid, and wants to deliver them into the hand of the Amorites in Canaan.
The Midrash and the Gemara both tell us that because of one night’s crying (that happened to be on the 9th day of Av, what’s known in Hebrew as “Tisha B’av”), this night will be a night of crying for posterity. From this decree came the destruction of both Holy Temples, the Spanish Inquisition, and the exile of our people to this very day. Not only that, but the entire generation was killed off and not allowed to enter the Land of Israel except for Yehoshua Bin Nun and Calev ben Yephune, the two spies who spoke favorably about Hashem and the Land of Israel.
Wait a second – an entire history of suffering for one night of complaint? Is that fair punishment? Why not just punish the generation that cried and complained about Hashem? Why the destruction of the Temple, the Spanish Inquisition, exile, and even the Holocaust? Millions of Jews in the gas chambers, terrorist bombings, missile attacks, divorces, tragedies with children, financial disaster – look at all our reasons for crying! All because of one night of crying and complaining?
There is no transgression in the Torah that has even one millionth of the punishment that crying, complaining, and ingratitude have, as we so blatantly see in the aftermath of the complainers, which the Torah calls ‘nirganim’ – those who cry and complain for no reason. King Solomon, the wisest of all men says (Proverbs 16:28), Nirgan mafrid aluph, in other words, complaining creates a total breach with Hashem, Heaven forbid. In other words, as soon as a person cries and complains, he’s on his own and that’s really bad news.
So we’re still crying for one night of complaint? No. I said earlier that we don’t understand Hashem’s punishment for the sake of argument. But we really can understand Hashem’s punishment: we’re not crying to this very day for one night of complaint. We’re still crying because we haven’t yet stopped complaining. Hashem is showing us that as long as we continue with our ingratitude and our crying, we’ll continue to have plenty of reasons to cry.
Rebbe Natan explains that all this is simple to understand: since a person fails to thank Hashem, he separates himself from Hashem and all sorts of calamity befalls him. But, if he would strengthen himself in emuna, and thank Hashem for everything, then not only would his troubles end, but Diaspora and exile would end also. Simply speaking, by thanking Hashem, we can bring the Geula and Moshiach this very minute!
Let’s recognize that terrible character flaw of ingratitude. This is the source of all our troubles. Ingratitude is the terrible character flaw that we all came here to correct. Complaining and crying shuts a person completely off from Hashem; that means that Hashem won’t hear that person’s prayers and doesn’t want to hear that person’s voice, for crying and complaining – like sadness and depression – come from the dark and unholy side of spirituality, the opposite of holiness.
If ingratitude, crying and complaining are bad news, then the opposite – expressing our gratitude with song and joy – works miracles and invokes phenomenal Divine compassion. The entire task of a Jew is to give thanks, for the Hebrew word for Jew, Yehudi, means “one who gives thanks.” If you thank Hashem for everything, you won’t have to run after rebbes and mekubalim to ask for blessings because you’ll be blessed in every single way. On the other hand, if a person persists in crying and complaining, no blessing will help him.
One young woman told me that she began writing down the miracles and the big blessings that Hashem does for her in a little notebook that she keeps in her purse. Ever since, she’s always happy because she’s always thanking Hashem.
Why does Moshiach tarry? We don’t yet have the Geula because we haven’t yet decided to stop complaining and to start thanking Hashem. Plenty of people that are in contact with us can tell you about the miracles they’ve seen in seemingly hopeless situations, such as terminal diseases and insurmountable debts – by simply thanking Hashem.
How can Rebbe Nachman say that there’s no bad in the world at all? Simple – since Hashem does everything for the best, then everything Hashem does is good, and we should thank Him for it! From the standpoint of emuna, complaining that something is bad is the worst form of heresy. No wonder crying and complaining cause calamity.
People think that thanking Hashem for everything – for the good and the seemingly opposite – is some kind of Breslever shtick. Sorry – it’s an absolute obligation according to Halacha (see Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 222:3).
What can we do to rectify the terrible trait of ingratitude, crying, and complaining? Two things:
First, we should devote half of our daily hitbodedut – 30 minutes a day – to asking Hashem to help us overcome this terrible trait, until we really feel the change within us.
Second, our sages say that whoever lacks gratitude to his fellow man will certainly lack gratitude to Hashem. Therefore, we should make a special effort to say thank you to anyone that does a favor for us, especially to our parents and our spouses. By the way, if you have a problem with marital strife, you can solve it in a minute: just buy a little pocket notebook and jot down all the favors that your spouse does for you every single day. 99% of shalom-bayit problems stem from ingratitude.
If you lack something, whether it be a soulmate, a job, or children of your own, thank Hashem for an hour a day for your deficiency and you’ll see major miracles.
By breaking the chains of ingratitude, we’ll all see real freedom of body and soul, Moshiach tzidkenu and the full redemption of our people Israel, amen!
8/07/2014
Ingratitude – Choice and results Rav Shalom Arush in Garden of Emunah points out that ingratitude was at the root of Adam's fall .. Adam added 5 little words that were recorded in Genesis. the woman THAT YOU, G-D, GAVE ME gave me and I ate. It led to the destruction of mankind at the Mabul, the dispersion 300 years later, the DOR Bamibar, and a whole host of problems following. it is an extremely negative trait as if the ingrate feels the whole universe OWES HIM something.
8/07/2014
Rav Shalom Arush in Garden of Emunah points out that ingratitude was at the root of Adam's fall .. Adam added 5 little words that were recorded in Genesis. the woman THAT YOU, G-D, GAVE ME gave me and I ate. It led to the destruction of mankind at the Mabul, the dispersion 300 years later, the DOR Bamibar, and a whole host of problems following. it is an extremely negative trait as if the ingrate feels the whole universe OWES HIM something.