Flipping the Switch

Hitbodedut, personal prayer before G-d, is greater than anything else. That is, a person should set aside at least an hour or more every day to seclude himself from others and speak to G-d in his own language (Likutei Moharan 2:25).

It happens occasionally that friends or family members ask me for advice for their problems as I try to be a comforting shoulder to lean on. Since Hashem is constantly in my thoughts and He runs the world, I reply accordingly. The problem is, most of the time, it is not what they want to hear. If, for example, I tell them that all physical ailments have a spiritual cause, they think it’s all very nice but don’t take it seriously. They want a tangible solution. I also suggest that they utilize Rav Shalom Arush’s teachings to first give thanks for the tribulation, since regardless of the magnitude of the pain, it is all for the very best. This show of appreciation will in turn invoke Divine Mercy. I’m up against a brick wall because discussing hitbodedut (personal prayer) is usually rejected out of hand as something only certain people do, implying that it is just plain weird to talk to G-d. The suggestion that He actually answers, is met with a look I prefer to avoid.  My heart aches that they refuse to believe me. If only they would take that step and give it a try.

When I speak to Hashem, He DOES really listen and He DOES respond. Even though He doesn’t speak to me in a way that would probably have me committed (I don’t hear a booming voice thundering down from the sky), He does present me with ideas, resolutions and revelations that I could never have thought of without His help.  One only needs to undertake this practice once, with an open mind and sincerity, to feel a tiny spark of Divine inspiration. Each subsequent session brings a person that much closer to the warmth and love that can come solely from G-d’s all-encompassing presence. All the skeptics out there are now probably thinking it’s a figment of my imagination; that all the clarity I obtain through hitbodedut comes about simply by talking things out with myself. Wrong. We do not create our own thoughts. They enter us from a higher sphere, a spiritual world connected to our souls, beyond our physical bodies.

I find it a great irony when someone is religious, observes Shabbat and kashrut and prays according to the prescribed prayers, yet belittles hitbodedut.  How can we accept G-d enough to pray to Him three times a day and not comprehend that He is available 24/7, literally at our beckoned call? Before I allow frustration to overcome me when someone just doesn’t ‘get it’, I remind myself that I, too, was once standing in his or her place.  Even after I became shomer mitzvot (observing the commandments), I could still not completely grasp that certain things were not due to the hard work of man. We are mistakenly programmed to believe that we are responsible for our own successes and that a doctor, through the treatment he prescribes, deserves full credit for any miraculous recovery in his patient’s health. The medical practitioner, despite all his worthy efforts, is merely a tool in Hashem’s hand for our benefit, if we so deserve.  News headlines are filled with what this and that government figure is planning. They can plot all they want; what counts is what the Holy One, Blessed be He, has in store.

Also, if we are constantly absorbed in movies, TV, and non-Jewish music, an invisible barrier obstructs our view of reality. No one can see clearly when looking through a foggy lens. The entertainment industry has a direct negative impact on our neshama (soul). I remember how at one point I knew that spiritual growth was my only salvation, but I could not break away from a couple of TV shows that had me regularly glued to our television set like a zombie. It wasn’t until we got rid of the TV that I was finally able to flip the switch. From that moment, something changed within my being and I was then able to be a receptacle for holiness. Until that occurrence, I didn’t even WANT to be holy. I yearned to be happy but in my closed mind, piety was not synonymous with enjoyment. I followed the laws because I felt obligated, mostly out of fear of G-d instead of love. Now that I have opened myself up and have a personal relationship with our Father in Heaven, I view life in totally different perspective. I put the Master of the Universe in every equation for there is no place He does not exist. Ein Od Milvado – There is nothing but Him.

As a result of acknowledging His Supremacy in all matters I have seen miracles. We are all G-d’s children and each one of us has the potential to tap into the wellspring of wonders that Hashem is retaining for us. We just need to ask. This is the essence of emuna.

Rabbi Brody writes in “The Trail to Tranquility” pg. 270 ‘Nothing benefits your soul, brings you so close to G-d, and paves the way to genuine inner peace like personal prayer’. If some of my children and friends feel I am judging them unfairly, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. I am not here to criticize anyone.  My goal is to help others see what I have come to perceive as the only way to ensure our happiness, both in this world and the next. I am emphatically and unconditionally concerned for their well-being, because I love them with all my heart. This must surely be a slight tinge of what Hashem feels as our loving Father and Creator.

As someone who was once lost in the dark, I can relate fully to the notion of having difficulty flipping the switch, but you will see once you do that your life will suddenly become brighter than you could ever have imagined.